Cattycornered, Cattywhumpus, Off Kilter even

That is what this blog will be doing for a bit. Going a little all of the above. But first I feel I should share the actual pronunciation and meaning of the words in my title so that non-ENC folks can use them properly. :)
Cattycornered is technically cater-cornered meaning diagonally.
Cattywhumpus is catawampus meaning askew or awry.
Off kilter is out of kilter meaning out of alignment.

This blog started as a way to share my canning and cooking experiences. However, I found that through this blog, I am beginning to appreciate where I am from and who I am. I feel pulled in the direction to turn it into something more than food. I recently read My So Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife: A One Year Experiment by Sara Horn. It is a wonderful book and it really opened my eyes to the many blessings God has given me. Then came the question... "Am I presenting them (my blessings) in a way that is to his glory?" Dum dum dummmmmmm. Cue overly dramatic music and me with bent index finger to my lips. (Oh my dear sweet Mama, I am so sorry I watched the Young and the Restless with Grandma Turner every summer afternoon. It really did have an effect.) Well, take a minute call your mama and let her talk you up, put on your best dress, do your hair and make-up and maybe even hit the nail salon because you are going to need to feel good about yourself before you ask that question. It goes down hill faster than my dog down the steps when you say "chicken jerky". Translation- nope.

So that led to my really reading Proverbs 31. When I sat down I just knew I was going to have a perfect score. Ha! HA! I say. I have not failed a test this bad since high school geometry. (Oh honey- math is an evil four letter word.) The transcript for that conversation is below.

New Living Translation-
10 [b]Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies.
11 Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life.
12 She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.

10 Well, I prefer sapphires because they are my birthstone but rubies will work.
11 Trust-Check! Enrich-Definitely! My chocolate hot pot desserts alone enrich his life.
12 Check! Ok if you don't count the time I hauled off and knocked the snot out of his arm for being a butthead about my new hair cut. Ok, so 1/2 check.

13 She finds wool and flax and busily spins it.
14 She is like a merchant’s ship, bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan the day’s work for her servant girls.

13 I spin it right on around in the washing machine BUT not the dryer
14 Does the Farmer's Market and the Whole Foods on Wade Ave count as afar? It is a bit of a drive from North Raleigh.
15 Have you met me? That would be a negative.

16 She goes to inspect a field and buys it; with her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She is energetic and strong, a hard worker.
18 She makes sure her dealings are profitable; her lamp burns late into the night.

16 If by fields you mean a Red Dot sale at Belk's and vineyard you mean wine, SUCCESS!
17 This one I feel comfortable saying yes without the risk of lightening.
18 Triple coupons at HT, baby. I am definitely more of an night owl

19 Her hands are busy spinning thread, her fingers twisting fiber.
20 She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy.
21 She has no fear of winter for her household, for everyone has warm[c] clothes.

19 I can sew a mean button there lovechops!
20 Hmmm... Could I be doing more?
21 Fear, worry? Me, nope not me, not one teeny tiny little bit. Never ever ever.

22 She makes her own bedspreads. She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.
23 Her husband is well known at the city gates, where he sits with the other civic leaders.
24 She makes belted linen garments and sashes to sell to the merchants.

22 I buy my own bedspreads and did I mention the Red Dot sale? Cute stuff thanks to those.
23 He really doesn't talk much but he is a good, kind man who is well thought of by his family and those who meet him.
24 Does helping make lawyers count?

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
26 When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.
27 She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness.

25 See 21
26 Crickets chirping... (still working on this one)
27 One word- ouch. Maybe I need to apply more of 17 to my household and not just my job.

28 Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her:
29 “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!”

28 No children of my own but I am HUGE on the 12 month to 8 year old circuit. He does praise me but again could I be doing more?
29 In my mind maybe but not by example not yet anyway.

30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the LORD will be greatly praised.
31 Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.

Well as we can all see, there is work to be done in the my 31 household! And that is what I am doing. I am starting a journey to get my home and life in order. I want others to see God through me. I want you to feel the love of God, family, and friends in our home. I plan on starting first with my house and yard. How do I do that?

Darn those crickets are chirping again...